Dear Editor: This February, the Sitka Youth Leadership Committee and its Peer Education team recognize Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month.
Teen dating violence is not only defined as physical abuse, but can also include sexual, mental and emotional abuse. While it might not seem like something that could affect a teen that you care about, it is more common than you may think.
Nationally, nearly 1.5 million high school students will experience physical abuse from a dating partner in a single year (loveisrespect.org). Addressing teen dating violence is especially important here in Alaska, where over half of adult women experience intimate partner violence, sexual violence, or both in their lifetimes (Alaska Victimization Survey). Experiencing dating violence as a teen increases the risk of experiencing domestic violence as an adult. According to 2023’s Youth Risk Behavior Survey, in the last year, 10% of Alaskan high school students who are dating or have dated experienced sexual dating violence, and 6% experienced physical dating violence. These rates are comparable for youth in Sitka.
Adults can intervene in unhealthy teen relationships by being a person of support. While it can be hard from the outside to tell if a relationship is abusive, there are warning signs to look out for. Some of these signs include controlling behaviors, demeaning comments, acts of jealousy, isolation (withdrawing from family and only spending time with one another), extreme mood swings, explosive outbursts, or any form of physical harm.
If you notice these signs in a teen’s relationship, whether you’re a peer or an adult, it’s important to respond non-judgmentally and create a safe space to talk about it. Don’t blame or patronize them but instead reassure them it’s not their fault and ask open-ended questions, such as, “What do you feel comfortable doing next?” and “What can I do to support you?” to decide next steps together.
Believe in what they are saying and be someone whom the teen can trust. Maintaining confidentiality and working together to identify resources is extremely important in building trust with the teen; however, if the information shared indicates the minor is endangered, it may be important to seek additional help and/or to report it. Experiencing an abusive relationship is hard, and so is leaving one; continue showing up to support them as they navigate this challenging situation.
SAFV advocates can always be reached by calling (907) 747-3370 or texting (907) 623-7820, and can support teens facing dating violence or their loved ones. Sitka’s Child Advocacy Center, which helps children who have experienced abuse, their caregivers, and families, can be reached at (907) 519-0154. National resources developed specifically for teens and supportive adults include loveisrespect.org and IKnowMine.org, which provide advocacy for young people who have questions or concerns about unhealthy relationships. For a full list of resources go to sitkayouthleadership.com. Remember, everyone has the right to feel safe and loved in their relationship.
Sitka Youth Leadership Committee
Peer Education Team
